oh god. was i so fucking pissed.
hanged out with my mommy today. hoho.
we caught lake house, which was kind of a confusing movie but who cares cause there's keanu and sandra bullock. and i had kenny rogers which is always good and i bought stuffs. which looks kind of strange to me now. oh wells. all in good time
31.7.06
237
hot damn! i just finished watching gone with the wind. that movie is super long but is chokeful with everything. i hope i can write 12 bloody pages on it. which i should start doing soon. and french is due this week. luckily our multicam is next, else i'd die from the pressure! okay randomness of it all (:
28.7.06
236
i suddenly have the urge to pack up and leave. to stay in a country with cool seasons and friendly people. i suddenly want to go back to perth. i want to live on my own with friends and knowing that i have full responsibility. i want all these, and more. if only i have the money and the means. and i'm jealous that they have the opportunity to do just so. that i am still stuck here with super hot weather, with not much chance of ever escaping overseas. but if i do get the chance, then i think i will be scared shitless. no safety net, no comfort zone. a whole new adventure.
but it's good to go beyond the borders that is set around me. maybe i'll surprise myself. who knows? i just want to fast forward to the future. i want to see, if only a glimpse what i'll be like, what things will be like two years from now. when we've all graduated. what happens then? what comes next after life in poly? suddenly the future does not seem so exciting. oh pppffffftttt
but it's good to go beyond the borders that is set around me. maybe i'll surprise myself. who knows? i just want to fast forward to the future. i want to see, if only a glimpse what i'll be like, what things will be like two years from now. when we've all graduated. what happens then? what comes next after life in poly? suddenly the future does not seem so exciting. oh pppffffftttt
25.7.06
235
reading her blog entries always leaves me reeling and wishing that i can write like her. to be so random about everything, but able to put your point across. reading about film noir is going to become a huge headache. and i do feel happy being able to see my chee ko pek. i dont know how to explain it, but i do (: and he's in law and that's that. and i feel so full, i've been eating like no one's business. and i read blogs and they complain about sec school and workload and i feel smug cause i know that that is so behind me already. no more waking up at six, to copy homework, to do this to rush that. but i value the experience and i'm here now and that's all that matters. taking a trip down memory lane, i 'm thankful for the friends that lasted up till now. those that i met along the way, but lost, and those that i gained, as i go even ahead. look how far all of us have come now. and the only thing waiting for us now is death. there are times when i feel too scared to fall asleep cause i fear that i will not wake up tomorrow. so i say a prayer and hope that i'll be awake to see another day.
times spend together is love. but who will remain, ten years from now?
oh mr sun, sun
mr golden sun
please shine down on me
times spend together is love. but who will remain, ten years from now?
oh mr sun, sun
mr golden sun
please shine down on me
23.7.06
233
woo hoo! happy birthday to the bestie! hoped you had fun yesterday ((:
-
well i'm almost done with the designs though now i think it looks like an ad for pub crawling or some crap like that. i was so freaking pissed off at her for screwing things up for me. didnt even bother to mention it and now i have to suffer. i have to be up soon! grrr! and i spent a whole night. ultimately, i have to make some changes. if they are going to pick their crap over my crap then i'm gonna boycott the entire event. petty i know, but i refuse to go if the people dont trust me to handle my side of things. paahhh. all's done anyway. pish posh bang bang boom!
tjan, you cheered me up with the graphics!
quick quick club-box, download faster faster!
where's my nad?
she's right here (:
-
well i'm almost done with the designs though now i think it looks like an ad for pub crawling or some crap like that. i was so freaking pissed off at her for screwing things up for me. didnt even bother to mention it and now i have to suffer. i have to be up soon! grrr! and i spent a whole night. ultimately, i have to make some changes. if they are going to pick their crap over my crap then i'm gonna boycott the entire event. petty i know, but i refuse to go if the people dont trust me to handle my side of things. paahhh. all's done anyway. pish posh bang bang boom!
tjan, you cheered me up with the graphics!
quick quick club-box, download faster faster!
where's my nad?
she's right here (:
16.7.06
231
it's times like this that i treasure most. hanging out, having aimless conversations and laughing at the most random things. i heart you guys bits to pieces and pieces to bits <333
standing there watching the fireworks, i marveled at the awsome-ness of it all. it feels as though they are coming on to you, ready to shower you with all their sparkle and dazzle.
and bestie, i know it's tough, and i know it's so cliche, but you have to be strong and be patient. it's just one of the many trials and obstacles that you have to go through. god's always testing the ones that he loves most, take that to heart k? all of us are here for you babe. you'll learn and you'll recover and heal, step by step. bit by bit. happiness is there, waiting for you just around the corner. if ever you feel down, give me call, you promised to take over the world with me remember? happy thoughts and monkey love. i heart you babe (:
seriously, i do not know what it would be like without all you amazing people
oh so emo ((:
trip to japan: 3 years time! start saving lovelies! climbing mount fuji, disney world, underwater world, hokkaido, hot guys hunting, ONE WHOLE MONTH!
standing there watching the fireworks, i marveled at the awsome-ness of it all. it feels as though they are coming on to you, ready to shower you with all their sparkle and dazzle.
and bestie, i know it's tough, and i know it's so cliche, but you have to be strong and be patient. it's just one of the many trials and obstacles that you have to go through. god's always testing the ones that he loves most, take that to heart k? all of us are here for you babe. you'll learn and you'll recover and heal, step by step. bit by bit. happiness is there, waiting for you just around the corner. if ever you feel down, give me call, you promised to take over the world with me remember? happy thoughts and monkey love. i heart you babe (:
seriously, i do not know what it would be like without all you amazing people
oh so emo ((:
trip to japan: 3 years time! start saving lovelies! climbing mount fuji, disney world, underwater world, hokkaido, hot guys hunting, ONE WHOLE MONTH!
15.7.06
230
and we're all searching for that one elusive thing that is just out of grasp.
finally, a break from it all, a chance to regroup and charge up the batteries.
we're like robots going through the motions.
will we still be friends five years from now?
are you still free, to take over the world with me? (:
finally, a break from it all, a chance to regroup and charge up the batteries.
we're like robots going through the motions.
will we still be friends five years from now?
are you still free, to take over the world with me? (:
13.7.06
229
neeehhhh, happy happy HAPPY!
cause the production went on smoothly, no major screw ups, awesome chemistry between the guest, who we owe big time and excellent excellent crew members. ((:
and we're done, at least for now. even bmr cant burst my bubble right now! hoho
i took a total of 8 buses today. the most number ever.
"we met on a beach at australia"
awesome awesome awesome. though we did a total of 6 takes and most probably tired our guest to the bone. superb job everyone! hahahahah. still cant shake the excitement off! and the eyeliner! they look like goth boys who got lost along the way. hoho
cause the production went on smoothly, no major screw ups, awesome chemistry between the guest, who we owe big time and excellent excellent crew members. ((:
and we're done, at least for now. even bmr cant burst my bubble right now! hoho
i took a total of 8 buses today. the most number ever.
"we met on a beach at australia"
awesome awesome awesome. though we did a total of 6 takes and most probably tired our guest to the bone. superb job everyone! hahahahah. still cant shake the excitement off! and the eyeliner! they look like goth boys who got lost along the way. hoho
12.7.06
11.7.06
10.7.06
226
speak up child, don't say a word
-
i found you lurking in the shadows
just around the corner
and i wanted so much,
to toss pure sunshine
to have that smile back on your face
rainbow dreams & monkey love
hello moonshine,
say goodbye to tomorrow
-
and you're trying so hard.i know that time is important. i just want to waste these two days away. let me face the battles later on, let me have this freedom of not knowing. though the heart secretly knows. you are my fantasy. moonshine, moonshine, can you hear me calling your name?
and it devastates, me, your smile. tears me into two, right down the middle. can you make the cut clean please? and dont forget my heart on the way out. how does it feel like to be so broken that you think that you can never be fixed up again? and how is it that people are so blind to the things that are blatantly in their face but are yet aware of the subtle differences?
and i felt so lonely these past two days, i just wanted someone to talk to. to hear a voice on the other line and knowing i have their undivided attention. it's a blessing to have friends.
and the house is so empty and alone. peaceful times and rainy nights. is that a shadow i see lurking past?
am i really happy? was i really happy? i feel like drifting away into the unknown. will you miss me then? all the questions and answers. and answers and questions. do you really know me? do i really know you? we dont show who we are to the world do we? there's still a part that's secret and unknown. waiting to be discovered. walks in the nights, whispering in the darkness.
looking at you makes me long for you, more than i should. and you see me, but do you really see me? listen to me and symphatize? maybe everyone is a fake. maybe everyone is putting up a front just so no one can figure out that they are torn up and messed up in the inside. through writing, am i really expressing what i feel? i dont want to sound like an emo fuck. appearances are deceiving. it's a mask that we hide behind.
show me someone who's pure and simple. no layers underneath. oh how i long, so badly. but i'll be marching on, soldiering on straight ahead. till it all comes to an end.
-
i found you lurking in the shadows
just around the corner
and i wanted so much,
to toss pure sunshine
to have that smile back on your face
rainbow dreams & monkey love
hello moonshine,
say goodbye to tomorrow
-
and you're trying so hard.i know that time is important. i just want to waste these two days away. let me face the battles later on, let me have this freedom of not knowing. though the heart secretly knows. you are my fantasy. moonshine, moonshine, can you hear me calling your name?
and it devastates, me, your smile. tears me into two, right down the middle. can you make the cut clean please? and dont forget my heart on the way out. how does it feel like to be so broken that you think that you can never be fixed up again? and how is it that people are so blind to the things that are blatantly in their face but are yet aware of the subtle differences?
and i felt so lonely these past two days, i just wanted someone to talk to. to hear a voice on the other line and knowing i have their undivided attention. it's a blessing to have friends.
and the house is so empty and alone. peaceful times and rainy nights. is that a shadow i see lurking past?
am i really happy? was i really happy? i feel like drifting away into the unknown. will you miss me then? all the questions and answers. and answers and questions. do you really know me? do i really know you? we dont show who we are to the world do we? there's still a part that's secret and unknown. waiting to be discovered. walks in the nights, whispering in the darkness.
looking at you makes me long for you, more than i should. and you see me, but do you really see me? listen to me and symphatize? maybe everyone is a fake. maybe everyone is putting up a front just so no one can figure out that they are torn up and messed up in the inside. through writing, am i really expressing what i feel? i dont want to sound like an emo fuck. appearances are deceiving. it's a mask that we hide behind.
show me someone who's pure and simple. no layers underneath. oh how i long, so badly. but i'll be marching on, soldiering on straight ahead. till it all comes to an end.
9.7.06
7.7.06
224
my mouth feels oh so very raw
it hurts
-
pffffttttt almost lost my wallet at the library just now. scared me half to death! thank god for lovely secondary school kids. though i did not thank them as i didn't know who they were. and the librarian was saying, now the whole library knows your name. name name gnome.
whhheeee, done with journals!
it hurts
-
pffffttttt almost lost my wallet at the library just now. scared me half to death! thank god for lovely secondary school kids. though i did not thank them as i didn't know who they were. and the librarian was saying, now the whole library knows your name. name name gnome.
whhheeee, done with journals!
3.7.06
223
when there are too many things to be done and i feel dizzy due to the sheer amount of work that has to be completed, making a list helps. i don't feel so pressured anymore. i just have to start cracking right now. if only i dont feel so sleepy.
sent dad off to paupa new guinea or however it is that you spell it today. he's going to be away for two weeks or less. i kind of feel sad that he had to go, though mom probably thinks i couldn't care less. it's hard for me to show people how i feel. i never, at all hug or kiss him the way my brother does. i hope he knows i care too (:
sent dad off to paupa new guinea or however it is that you spell it today. he's going to be away for two weeks or less. i kind of feel sad that he had to go, though mom probably thinks i couldn't care less. it's hard for me to show people how i feel. i never, at all hug or kiss him the way my brother does. i hope he knows i care too (:
2.7.06
222
when ever you think you're alone, banish that thought, cause we'll always be here for you. even if you don't feel like talking,we'll be here. we have your back yeah. promise (:
cheer up darl, things will be back to normal soon enough *hugs*
-
digressing for awhile. just finished watching dreamboys and it was awesome, though i hardly understood anything. koki and jin cried in the end and i realised that kame puts in twice as much effort as compared to everyone else. that boy works super hard it's amazing he still has so much energy! the performance at the end was super good. i think everyone enjoyed the performances more than they did the play. hoho. but that's just me. ryo and jin sang like a quarter of care. those two boys can harmonise damn well. (: could tell that they were able to click. kame sang a really nice song at the end. after performing kizuna, koki was openly crying while jin kind of wiped his tears away at the end of it. ryo just stood there like a rock, not moving at all! the people around him were all dancing and swaying and he was just there, stoning. pfffffffttt. gay boy he is. and i got confused with this dreamboys and hey say dreamboy. i was waiting for ryo to perform cherish with those bakas dancing around him but i got the title wrong. all dreamboys here there everywhere. johnny needs to hire someone to think of super cool names. i mean, there's a band called kitty gym for heaven's sake. *meow* hoho
oh god, this is my first full fledge johnny's post! hahahahah
-
went to catch soccer yesterday at pasir ris with the girls. had fun though we had super duper ultra uncomfortable seats. that's cause we had to sit on the stairs and had to strain the neck to watch the match. it's a lovely place cept for that stupid waiter who kept walking slowly back and forth in front of the screen. he caused us to miss the first germany goal! baka. there was quite a sizeable crowd too. it's so much fun watching football with others rather than staying alone at home. it's a whole different atmosphere. people cheering for their teams, disappointment when the ball did not make it through the goal and screams, when it did. and i tooks sips of jia-jia's iced coffee drink and i was wide awake when i reached home. imagine what would happen if i actually drank an entire glass. and zy's dad was so nice to send us home! it's quite fun to drive through the streets at two o'clock in the morning. it's so empty and the light is always green.
vvvvrrrrrooooommmmmmmm!
-
the thingy was quite ok, surprisingly. they showed us brutal images of babies that were aborted. horrid horrid pictures of them black caused they were killed by acid or broken, when they were smashed to pieces. it's so sad to see those tiny bodies. some had no head, some had features-ears, eyes, nose. what sort of women would throw away something as precious as that? but who am i to judge? i believe that each of them have their own reasons, their own excuses, as to why they had to go through with it. no sane mom would do it, just because. but people like that do exist don't they? my life is so sheltered, that when i'm shown images like these, i am horrified. not everything is as pure and as simple anymore. there's a world out there. people are living lives, enjoying or cursing each moment. i hope that whatever the case, they have someone they can trust and lean on. even though it is only one, it is so much better, than being alone. no man is an island no? (:
cheer up darl, things will be back to normal soon enough *hugs*
-
digressing for awhile. just finished watching dreamboys and it was awesome, though i hardly understood anything. koki and jin cried in the end and i realised that kame puts in twice as much effort as compared to everyone else. that boy works super hard it's amazing he still has so much energy! the performance at the end was super good. i think everyone enjoyed the performances more than they did the play. hoho. but that's just me. ryo and jin sang like a quarter of care. those two boys can harmonise damn well. (: could tell that they were able to click. kame sang a really nice song at the end. after performing kizuna, koki was openly crying while jin kind of wiped his tears away at the end of it. ryo just stood there like a rock, not moving at all! the people around him were all dancing and swaying and he was just there, stoning. pfffffffttt. gay boy he is. and i got confused with this dreamboys and hey say dreamboy. i was waiting for ryo to perform cherish with those bakas dancing around him but i got the title wrong. all dreamboys here there everywhere. johnny needs to hire someone to think of super cool names. i mean, there's a band called kitty gym for heaven's sake. *meow* hoho
oh god, this is my first full fledge johnny's post! hahahahah
-
went to catch soccer yesterday at pasir ris with the girls. had fun though we had super duper ultra uncomfortable seats. that's cause we had to sit on the stairs and had to strain the neck to watch the match. it's a lovely place cept for that stupid waiter who kept walking slowly back and forth in front of the screen. he caused us to miss the first germany goal! baka. there was quite a sizeable crowd too. it's so much fun watching football with others rather than staying alone at home. it's a whole different atmosphere. people cheering for their teams, disappointment when the ball did not make it through the goal and screams, when it did. and i tooks sips of jia-jia's iced coffee drink and i was wide awake when i reached home. imagine what would happen if i actually drank an entire glass. and zy's dad was so nice to send us home! it's quite fun to drive through the streets at two o'clock in the morning. it's so empty and the light is always green.
vvvvrrrrrooooommmmmmmm!
-
the thingy was quite ok, surprisingly. they showed us brutal images of babies that were aborted. horrid horrid pictures of them black caused they were killed by acid or broken, when they were smashed to pieces. it's so sad to see those tiny bodies. some had no head, some had features-ears, eyes, nose. what sort of women would throw away something as precious as that? but who am i to judge? i believe that each of them have their own reasons, their own excuses, as to why they had to go through with it. no sane mom would do it, just because. but people like that do exist don't they? my life is so sheltered, that when i'm shown images like these, i am horrified. not everything is as pure and as simple anymore. there's a world out there. people are living lives, enjoying or cursing each moment. i hope that whatever the case, they have someone they can trust and lean on. even though it is only one, it is so much better, than being alone. no man is an island no? (:
1.7.06
221
and it's there again, that sense of dread. cause i dont really feel like going for the thingy later on but i know i must go. responsibility sucks no?
well today was a waste of time but i did donwload dreamboys so that's something. gotta love windjp (:
i can't really explain what i'm feeling right now. it's all jumbled up inside but the main feeling here is doubt. i guess i'll just go and see what this event has in store for us. it doesnt hurt too to see all the lovelies again. see, i'm trying to make myself feel better but it is so not working.totally random. time to start cracking on the work that has to be done and completed. and i am still handphoneless. dad took off for work this morning and am not sure when he will be back. tis sucks. and my specs just looks plain wrong with one side metal and the rest all red. i swear, can anything else go wrong?
well today was a waste of time but i did donwload dreamboys so that's something. gotta love windjp (:
i can't really explain what i'm feeling right now. it's all jumbled up inside but the main feeling here is doubt. i guess i'll just go and see what this event has in store for us. it doesnt hurt too to see all the lovelies again. see, i'm trying to make myself feel better but it is so not working.totally random. time to start cracking on the work that has to be done and completed. and i am still handphoneless. dad took off for work this morning and am not sure when he will be back. tis sucks. and my specs just looks plain wrong with one side metal and the rest all red. i swear, can anything else go wrong?
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