i predict myself that i would be resentful, cranky and tired on wednesdays cause wednesdays are fucking long days which only ends at ten. it's raya but i dont feel like celebrating anymore. i dont understand my mood swings either so i hope you would be patient with me. if i keep quiet and not speak, i hope you'd understand. days like this happens to me often and i do not know why. blame pms, blame me, but this is it. i have bad days and good days and i wished he was here now. he wants to come over for raya and i cant say no. stupid people are kar-o-k-ing when i want to crawl into bed and shut off from the world. my heart feels heavy suddenly but i find peace being in the mosque. and talking about taking myself out from my comfort zone, welcome to the world of broadcast. i.am.so.out.of.my.league. this is freaking nuts. i just wished i wont end up as the one they laugh at when videos are showed. but i have to learn from this, views this in as much positive light as possible. so maybe it will build up my confidence and presentation skills. hopefully. wednesdays are going to suck.
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